Starting on February 13, 2011 I embarked on a long journey which I hope will be successful of taming my demons with food. I had gradually accumulated pounds after pounds to an excessive amount, both for my health and for my looks. Having battled with eating disorders since the age of thirteen, dieting was not the issue, but losing weight had become nearly impossible because of a terrible habit of starving myself regularly in order to mask the disorder.
I started using an online tool called Lose It! that proved very helpful because it allowed me to monitor, control and make myself accountable. Cheating was not necessary, I was very motivated by what I was seeing, the total calorie budget, the badges received, the interactions with my friends, and the precise portion control: whether I was in a binging mode or a starving one, I could closely see what I was doing with food. The whole idea was to balance my intake with what I was burning as calories, not to diet.
In the end, I bought the Curves Complete ® program, in an attempt to lose the last pounds I had to lose. I had already lost nearly forty pounds, and wanted to reach my goal weight of 130 pounds. I decided to journal during the twelve weeks of following the program.
I will now post the entries of my past journaling regularly here. Please feel free to comment, critique or encourage those efforts if you can relate!